A Slight Change to the Declaration of Independence

Happy Independence Day! On this day 234 years ago, the famous Declaration of Independence was approved and adopted by Congress, allowing the thirteen colonies to become separate independent states no longer under control of the British Empire.

doiI realize this document is more than just important, and I certainly mean it no disrespect by what I’m about to do…

Here at Spaloo, we use the term “independence” a lot. It’s a great word that sums up one of the most important benefits of a Spaloo bidet seat. By using a Spaloo toilet seat, those that may have faced bathroom challenges now have the opportunity for true independence…

  • Independence from relying on someone to help with your bathroom hygiene
  • Independence from toilet paper and the challenges of its use for those with limited mobility
  • Even independence from constipation and/or hemorrhoids

So, I thought it might be a good idea to examine and alter some of the Declaration of Independence a little so that it better fits a Spaloo toilet bidet seat. Here goes:


“When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the use of toilet paper which have connected them with the action of wiping, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal toileting station to which the Laws of Nature (get it? ha!) and of Nature’s God entitle them, a decent respect to the privacy mankind requires that they should declare the need for dignity which impel them to the separation.”

For the original version, click here.


I’m not so sure this is what our founding father’s meant by their words, but I think it works! Visit our site to learn how a Spaloo bidet seat can help you or loved ones make every day an Independence Day.

Enjoy your holiday!

Bruce

P.S: I hold these truths to be self evident, yet slightly self-promoting, and that all bidet seats are not created equal.